Trust is so important, that its manifestation literally holds the civilized world together. Almost nothing between people will work without trust. With it, comes cooperation; without it, suspicion runs rampant. Just think of the difference between trusting someone and not trusting them. When we trust them completely, cooperation is simple; when we don’t, e.g., we don’t believe what they say and their motives seem suspect, we balk.
The need for trust in order to live free is comprehensive. Just think about how bundled up life can get when we can’t trust anything people say? Would we take a drive in the country if we couldn’t trust our car? Do we buy food that we don’t trust to be safe? Would we trust politicians who have problems with the truth? Would we take a vaccine if we didn’t trust science? These are some of the very questions at the heart of America’s current upheaval.
It is difficult to name a single societal interaction where trust doesn’t make things better and the lack of it makes things worse. And yet trust is often hard to come by. After all, we can’t just go to the grocery store and buy it (although I heard Amazon is now selling it on-line – with free delivery!).
What is it about trust that makes it so necessary? Simply put, to take the leap of faith that trust requires, we must make ourselves vulnerable. Trusting reduces our feeling of vulnerability. No matter what we trust, we are accepting an assurance that things will work out. The more danger we face, the more trust is required on our part to assuage or reduce our feeling of vulnerability. We must trust someone or something to avoid the fear and anxiety that results from its lack.
If we have complete trust in someone or something that everything will be all right, the mind has no need for protection mechanisms like fear and anxiety to keep our guard up and keep us alert for danger. But if we completely trust someone or something, we can be confident that our trust is justified. This allows us to go forward with assurance.
When we don’t trust, no matter how much assurance given that all will be well, we just don’t buy it. And when we don’t, we get defensive and uncooperative. The basic human need for self-preservation kicks in and we refuse the advice, decline to use the product, or refuse to accept the help. In short, when we don’t trust, we don’t cooperate. Quite likely, we’ll take things into our own hands. When everyone starts taking everything into their own hands, chaos isn’t far behind.
So how do we trust? For me, to trust, I must figure out the level of reliability and dependability behind that which is asking for my trust. When we believe these two factors are high, we feel safe in making ourselves vulnerable to future outcomes by putting some aspect of our future in the hands of someone or something else. That’s trust. The more we trust, the more we feel assured.
Conversely, when we are anxious and fear-laden about some aspect of life, it is difficult to place our trust in anyone or anything. Truly, fear and trust are on opposite ends of life’s great teeter-totter. The more we trust in someone or something to deliver, the less we fear and/or the more we fear an outcome, the harder it is to muster even a modicum of trust.
But like all teeter-totters, the ends are connected by the plank between them, which in this case is the future. Because whether it’s about fear or about trust, it’s about the future. When we’re trusting, we’re putting forth the belief that the future is going to work out just fine. Anxiety, on the other hand, is quite bluntly fear of the future. And when we fear it, our mind tends to run wild with all kinds of potential bad stuff happening.
If we’re anxious about some future outcome (generalized anxiety being a fear of all outcomes), that fear will grab us and make us miserable. It’s no fun being afraid. When we trust, we have confidence that everything will work out and with confidence comes courage. To have confidence is to have faith that someone or something will reliably/dependably deliver the goods. Confidence gives us courage. Courage is trust in action. When we trust, we are putting faith in our belief that our trust is well placed. Therein lies the power of trust, that we can dare.
But no matter how much trust we place in our ability to prevail, some future dangers are so immense, we have no ability to affect them. The chief future peril of which I speak, is death. Sigmond Freud (and his brother French) believed that ego extinction is mankind’s biggest fear. He further believed humans invented God to assuage this mortal fear gripping humanity.
Before Freud, the French Enlightenment philosopher Voltaire (1694-1788) famously said, “If God didn’t exist, it would be necessary to invent Him” for precisely this reason. Because the idea of God tends to promote trust, cooperation, and adherence to behavioral norms amongst His minions, the “God” concept is necessary for cross-cultural cooperation. Many murders were not committed for fear of rotting in hell.
Placing our trust in God solves that problem. However, questions as to God’s existence seem to follow directly thereafter. But that argument is completely unnecessary. The question - Do you have a soul? makes it moot. Your answer will tell you everything you need to know about the nature of the universe. If you have one, then you have assurance that God is a loving Being who must exist. If you don’t, then according to TV, you might be a Zombie.
But what kind of God is God? The term connotes an Entity that is the essence of perfection in all aspects of His Being. That means He is all knowing and all powerful; He is the essence of love and His timing is perfect. He said He came to earth not to be served by us, but to serve us (as perfect love is wont to do). And that He loves us with a love so powerful we cannot begin to comprehend it. But it is there for us if we want it. All we have to do is ask.
But can we trust Him? Most people, when they think about whether they can trust such an Entity, start from the bottom up. Which means asking: Why would a Being so immense that He could create a universe with the snap of His fingers, care about tiny people on a tiny planet? Why would He make a point of taking us individually into consideration as part of every act?
However, in my view, it’s best to look at trusting God from the top down, i.e., starting with the definition of God Himself. If God is truly the best Being which can be conceived, then he must be a totally loving Being that cares about every single person. If a perfect being created the universe and put us here to learn, grow and develop, He did so for an overwhelmingly important reason – a perfect reason.
Luckily, that reason comes with perfect love, which means perfect care, and fortunately for us, God can’t lie and He doesn’t make mistakes. Maybe it will turn out that we’re here so we can learn to trust Him. Maybe we need to allow ourselves to become vulnerable, so that we can see firsthand that He can be trusted. Maybe that’s the blessed assurance.
What I’ve learned during my years on earth is that the more I trust God to handle everything so that it works out perfectly, the less I fear and the less I have to fear. And to the extent that I find myself afraid, I realize that I’m trying to manage everything on my own and I’m not trusting God to handle it perfectly for me. And by perfectly, I mean exactly that: God’s hand on my life causes everything to work out perfectly for me in the scope of His perfect plans for my life - every time. In light of that, what’s not to trust?
- My Friend John